Categories
acceptance growth happiness health and wellbeing inspiration journaling, gratitude personal development poetry community

New Year, Staying Present and Focusing on the Small stuff…

Hello there you and Happy New Year!

How are you feeling after the festive season? Are you glad to be getting back into a more structured routine?  I’m looking forward to getting back into a more healthier routine (too many sweets/tipples, but I enjoyed it all, and the banter that went along with it)
I had such a lovely time back home in Ireland catching up with family, and my brother who I haven’t seen in over 2 years due to Covid! I was grateful every day!

Present moment:

“It’s the feeling you get when you are able to be touched

By the simple things in life: watching a child playing,

The leaves falling from a tree”

Richard Carlson

When life stood tragically still in lockdown, I soaked up the outdoors, connecting so much with nature and my family.  I then started to crave nature and became more self aware. I soaked up those giggles from our girls; realising there is so much beauty out there and the free stuff like fresh air, fabulous beaches, sun sets and mountains: those breathtaking views is food for the soul!

When you stop striving for “perfection”, you  automatically start to slow down and realise all that beauty was right under your nose (while your mind was full of worry and busy from those to do lists, lots of unnecessary clutter taking up space in your mind)

Poetry outlet:

I wrote the following ‘etheree’ poem as a reminder to absorb those precious little moments…  Being present certainly is the way to do it. Sounds so easy doesn’t it? It is when you practice being present every day but you have to work on it, enjoying the simple little things in life, changing your thought process to a more “positive” way of thinking and being extremely grateful.

Grab it

It

Starts with

Fresh air. Free

Flawless. Simple.

But so powerful.

When you stop. Soak it up;

like sand soaking salty sprays,

gentle yet ferocious waves. The

present is all you have. Grab it, then

bottle it. Capturing every small bit!

Bernie Egerton

Enjoying that fresh air and watching the girls happy out at the beach!!
My eldest loves rolling down those sand dunes… Absorbing it all !

Growing from within, self-awareness being mindful and always learning; are the components to reaching that place of peace and happiness. Getting the most out of life for “you” and yours.

Work on ‘you’ and believe in yourself.  Trust me, the rest will follow!! 

Categories
poetry poetry community poetry writing tips wellbeing

Poetry during the festive season!

Hello there you!

How are you doing? Are you feeling the festive vibe now we’re into the month of December? I have to say I’m feeling the aul festive spirit myself, after putting up the tree with two excited little ladies this weekend!!

So, being part of a poetry writing club with a lovely group of inspiring/supportive mums. This months challenge is to write a poem every day during advent #mumpoemadventcalendar on instagram: where a festive prompt is posted each day. I’m loving the process so far, as it’s such a great way to motivate/inspire you to write!

The below acrostic poem used writing prompt “sellotape” for day 5 of the advent calendar challenge (I’ve been doing the prompts every day from the start and plan to keep it up)

I’m sure you can relate to the “sellotape” struggle!!

On my insta account if you would like to check it out: poetryandmotherhood

The next poem was from day 3 of the advent challenge using writing prompt “bauble”.

It’s lovely being part of writing clubs to help with your writing skills and getting those creative juices flowing!

What tips help you with your writing?

Have a beautiful day and belt out those Christmas tunes!


Categories
health and wellbeing managing stress motherhood personal development

Moving country, self-care and the simple things in life!

Hello there you!

When I first moved from Ireland to England in 2018 (and 15 weeks pregnant with our second child) we were so busy moving into a new home, registering with a maternity hospital, my husband starting work, running after a busy toddler and settling into our new surroundings (quite alot going on eh).. But being near my husbands parents really helped. Support is so important during times of “change”.

Self-care

When our second child arrived, the anxiety hit me like something else. Then the pandemic hit. I was overwhelmed during these unprecedented times (we all relate to this from lockdown don’t we!) and having had two children under two, while settling into a new country.

When you always try to be this “perfect” person and trying to do everything “right”, you ignore your internal feelings, while running on auto-pilot, therefore causing burnout. Ignoring “your” own needs. It’s not selfish prioritising your health. When doing so, you show up as the best person possible for your family and most importantly “yourself”.

Self-care is crucial for your overall physical and mental wellbeing. Should it be exercise, reading a book, a solo walk in nature with your own thoughts, being present and fully absorbing the moment with that hot cup of tea! It can be so simple but making all the difference!

Writing for me is cathartic and part of my self-care routine.  It’s an incredible way to process overwhelming feelings. Sometimes, it really is hard to get those words out, isn’t it? I had never written poetry before this pandemic: and oh my goodness how much you get from putting pen to paper and letting your thoughts flow and with such honesty.

I wrote the following poem last year, reminding myself on the importance of the “simple” little things in life.


The simple things

Now is a time to reflect and enjoy
the simple things that bring us much joy.
Lost in the moment, stay safe and be kind,
Dig deep from within, embrace what we find.

Pandemic is here, to stay for some time,
We learn to adapt, find comfort through rhyme
Laugh, joke, connect a bit more,
Stay safe as we pass through each other’s door.

A world we’re now asked to follow advice,
But never look back or ever think twice.
Simple things we learn to adore,
In a time we are still like never before.


Between moving country, settling into new surroundings and riding the choppy waves during these unprecedented times; writing is my therapy and part of my self-care ritual.

You realise how rich you really are when you practice gratitude and enjoy the simple things in life!!

Have you gone through changes/moved country recently?  What self-care routine do you enjoy?

Thank you for stopping by, enjoy the simple things and look after your body!

Have a beautiful day ❤

Categories
growth poetry poetry community Uncategorized

Poetry and growth

So over the past 18 months I’ve fallen in love with reading and writing poetry as a creative outlet. This pandemic has opened my soul up to new experiences and coming out of my comfort zone by sharing my written pieces and also blogging/writing with pure honesty.

I’m so thankful for this and it really has been beneficial to my wellbeing, growth and being more present.

I wrote the following poem in response to a writing prompt from the mum poem press “I choose poetry because” for national poetry day on 7/10/21. It certainly sums up my relationship with poetry.

I choose poetry because…

It reaches the depth of my soul

Pulls on every heart string –

Every avenue is beautiful,

Breathtaking, painful, invigorating

Still, raw and full of growth.

I choose poetry because I had to,

It just happened.

Sometimes words flow; I can’t help it

Sometimes words are harder to find –

I dig deeper

I will choose poetry ” always”

Bernie Egerton

Poetry handbook to learn more about the art

Great poetry handbook to learn more about the art and from Mary Oliver, who was a beautiful poet ❤

Have you discovered poetry during these times and how has your relationship with poetry been? Or what have you discovered as a new hobby?

Thank you for taking the time to read my posts and have a beautiful day ❤🙏

Categories
growth health and wellbeing self esteem, personal development, motivation, acceptance

People pleasing. How learning to say “no” helped me to reduce stress and to grow more as a person.

Hello there you!

Oh I could write so much about this topic.

You see, the thing is, I was a big people pleaser, and when I look back to who I was 5 years ago: I cringe to the point where my face resembles a tomato (now that’s red)

The beauty about writing this post, is acknowledging the fact of how far I’ve come. Back in my people pleasing days and not being able to say no; low self-esteem was definitely a contributing factor to my people pleasing tendencies, therefore causing me stress. Do you relate to this? Exhausting isn’t it?

Overcoming people pleasing

So how did I learn to say no more, am I now the master of saying no? Absolutely not, and you can’t say no all the time, it’s all about finding that balance and what suits “you”. But if I listen to my gut and know it doesn’t feel right, then I will say no in a diplomatic manner.

Saying no

At the start of finally plucking up the courage of saying no; I would wait for this dragon to turn around and blow that God damn fire straight into my face after I uttered those words (it never happens by the way). All you get is something like “ok that’s fine” then conversation continues to next topic. All that worrying, stress and overthinking for nothing. It doesn’t have to be as abrupt as no full stop, but something along the lines of “it doesn’t suit me this time”.

You see, the thing with me was “fear” of an awful argument happening (I also hate confrontation and would always build up how I really felt inside: the worst thing you can do) and would rather go ahead, stress the hell out of myself and plough along with appointments, get togethers, and making other people happy.

I remember a time where I was utterly exhausted (with working full-time and studying for a degree part time too) arranged to drive an hour after work to meet a friend to watch a show she was in, and all I wanted to do was sleep. Oh I went to that show and looking back, this lovely, lovely friend would have been ok If I said no (it was all down to my fear again of that dragon appearing)

The one person who needs your approval most is “yourself”. Start building on that relationship

-connectwithpoetry.com

Learning to say no

So how do you say no without feeling terribly guilty and stressed to the hilt? Start to work on yourself first, listen to your gut and baby steps.

Meditate, practice mindfulness to connect with your inner self ( whatever mindful practice helps you) I’ve been doing so much of this and that awareness helps you to tap into your “true” inner self.

Yes, learning to say no is hard, but the more you say it, the easier it gets over time and the less stressed you will become.

When I look back on a time when I was a big people pleaser, I just wasn’t aware I was doing it, and thought it was normal practice to get people to like you; seeking approval.

Remember to look out for “you” first

People pleasing is a trait many people have, for others saying no is like second nature (not second nature to me and what about you?)

Write a list from high priority to low and if it doesn’t suit, then say so. Remember to work with yourself through mindful practices, breathing exercises, writing your thoughts, whatever suits you.

Deep breaths are a great tool too. Take a step back and focus on how you are feeling.

The more you work on yourself, learning to say no and not pleasing others all the time will become easier. It’s all about finding that “balance”. Heck, I’m a Libra myself, and I’m working with those bloody scales every day. Growing, learning, self awareness and building myself to find that right balance.

You never stop learning/progressing/growing. Take your time.

Do you find it hard to say no? And do you feel you are pleasing others and putting their needs before your own?

Thank you for stopping by and reading my post!

It really is ok to say no. Be kind to yourself, and take your time ❤

Categories
health and wellbeing motivation social media habits

Social media, the dreaded scrolling and 5 tips to help you when a break is needed!

Hello you!

Ah yes, social media scrolling!

I deleted certain social media apps many years ago and have never looked back. Yes, I was the type that checked in everywhere, posted all those amazing photos – showing the perfect life? Smiling your little heart out (when in reality I was probably having a bad day). Reality? because there’s no such thing as the perfect social media portrayed life.

We all have good days, crappy days and when you look online at a perfect social media life on those crappy days it makes you feel worse, doesn’t it? Why post all the good stuff. Unfortunately its the way social media rolls these days.

Selfies:

Selfies are huge (something I was never into), especially with younger people and the pressure to look a certain way (lets not start on filters), could be damaging to your wellbeing. Heck, back in my teenage years (I’m 40) taking a picture meant waiting until the film was actually developed to see how you turned out!! That was ok as you weren’t obsessed on taking hundreds of photos for the perfect shot.

Reflecting:

During this pandemic it has been an eye opener for ‘everyone’ and to reflect on what really matters. Being honest, open and kinder to each other and most importantly yourself. We are all human at the end of the day and this pandemic has us re-evaluating what matters.

Social media as a supportive environment:

I only recently set up a poetry social media account to connect with other poets/writers to share our work.  A brilliant community of supportive and encouraging writers.  However, the scrolling addiction reared its ugly head yet again.

You see, the thing is, when you have apps on your phone, the handiness you have to just click on it: next thing you know you’re scrolling for 10 minutes, 20 minutes, it goes on – when initially you just wanted to have a quick look ( great exercise for the thumb, but not the brain). You’re sucked in – down that bloody rabbit hole you go.

On the other hand, however, social media is extremely beneficial for businesses, small businesses, promoting ideas and connecting
with communities for hobbies and also support. Its all about finding that balance and keeping the scrolling to a minimum.


Top 5 tips to curb your scrolling habits and what works for me.

1. Uninstall the apps from your phone.  I only have social media on my tablet now and only check in the evenings.

2. If  you dont want to uninstall apps from your phone turn the phone off – put it into a drawer or anywhere you dont have quick access to – and be mindful.

3. Turn off all those notifications.

4. Set yourself a time limit for social media use.

5.  Be aware of your habits when online. Always being mindful. Think to yourself is this really urgent?


Between portraying the perfect life, selfie obsessions and addictive scrolling habits: these five tips listed should help, if the scrolling gets a little bit out of hand, or you just need a social media break.

Go for a walk and absorb all that beauty. Read that book (the physical hardback/paper type)  instead of scrolling.  Partake in those hobbies you enjoy!

Have you control over your scrolling habits or has it got out of hand?

Thank you for reading my post!

Have a beautiful day and find the right balance!

Categories
relaxation

Visualization, connecting with nature and relaxation…

During a time when our busy lifestyle can make us feel tired, stressed and exhausted: taking time out for some mindful moments can help you to find that balance needed to reconnect with yourself. Visualization exercises are great for finding that balance needed and for a bit of ‘you’ time.

Connecting with nature:

A walk along the beach is so relaxing.  There’s something peaceful about being near the sea, listening to the swishing sound of that ocean, as your bare feet glides through those ripples. You can feel a sense of calm and connection to this beautiful environment, as you dip your toes into that water, feeling the smooth sand sinking under your grounded feet, being mindful throughout and soaking up that peaceful scene.

©️2020 Bernie Egerton
©️2020 Bernie Egerton

Its tough when you’re feeling anxious and trying to stay motivated and relaxed, especially during a global pandemic. Throughout lockdown, I found going for a brisk 20 minute walk outside and connecting with nature helped to clear my mind and reconnect with myself. Also being a mum, its important to have a bit of ‘you’ time, refreshing the mind and to relax if feeling overwhelmed.


©️2020 Bernie Egerton

Relaxation exercises are helpful if you are having trouble relaxing or sleeping. I’ve been practicing vizualization exercises on occasions where I struggle to fall asleep at night. Helping me to focus and relax while taking deep breaths throughout.


Visualization exercise:

The following technique, can help anytime when you’re feeling stressed. it can be very beneficial, especially after a busy day!

  • Close your eyes
  • Inhale deeply for 3 seconds
  • Exhale for 4 seconds
  • Visualize the soothing swishing ocean and the scene of that calming beach
  • Repeat, inhaling for 3 seconds and exhaling for 4 seconds

Deep breaths

Visualize

Relax…

Take some time out during periods of stress for relaxation exercises to recharge those batteries. You deserve it!

©️ 2021 Bernie Egerton

Categories
personal development

Each Step Forward Counts on This Journey…

In a time of uncertainty, each step forward does count, even if you take a step back some days. Its hard when you’re on a journey like no other. You’re human, we all are, and on this rocky road together (with lots of splinters along the way).

In a time when going to the shops was a simple little task, not having to worry about sanitizing, wearing a mask and social distancing. Now we have all these little added extras to remember. A walk along the street dodging other walkers, keeping that distance and missing a tight hug from family and friends and a chat over coffee…

I know there are times where you think its like groundhog day (it is) and nothing to look forward to. But focus on what gives you comfort and joy. Maybe a blast of your favourite music, a funny show on netflix, a jog or a bit of new-found creativity. Whatever gives you that ‘bit’ of joy.

Some days you dont have to juggle everything and expect to be this ‘perfect’ person. Nobody is.

Remember. Each step counts, forward and back.

YOU’VE got this. And keep going


Inner Strength –

Every step counts

Keep going

YOU’VE got this

connectwithpoetry.com

Categories
happiness

Happiness during a pandemic? I know. A short poem and something to think about…

What’s this, a poem about happiness during a global pandemic I hear you say? I know. It’s hard for you to think about such a word. But it’s during this pandemic when I wrote this poem (end of page) and, when my poetry journey began.

Digging deep from within and thinking ‘what is happiness’?  Is when you realise it’s the precious, daily things and not constantly chasing this ‘BIG’ idea of what makes ‘YOU’ happy.

We now have so much more time to think about and appreciate life during this Covid rollercoaster. Normal life stands still at the moment, and normality is that little bit away yet. But the light (although it seems far away) is beaming through those clouds, as this vaccine rollout continues and strives.

It’s a little piece of rhyming poetry to hopefully bring a smile to ‘your’ face and something to think about.


Happiness

Happiness is hearing your children giggle, Playing without a care.
Happiness is having a stroll on the beach
Inhaling that fresh air
Happiness is drinking cups of tea,
Relaxed without a worry.
Happiness is listening to music,
Lost but not in a hurry.
Happiness is watching flowers in bloom,
The warmth on a summer’s day.
Happiness is time with family and friends
Laughing and chatting away.
Happiness is laughing so hard,
Your eyes fill up with tears.
Happiness is sharing stories,
With family, friends;  no fears.
Happiness is the simple things
In life that make you feel whole.
Happiness is a connection –
Touching deep, within your soul.

©️ 2020 Bernie Egerton @ connectwithpoetry.com

Bee happy 🐝

Categories
motivation

A Limerick to Spur You on & how we Miss our Family & Friends

Limerick

Together we’re witty & wild
Loving our true inner child
Connections so strong
Oh its been too long
And that’s just putting it mild!!


Oh you do miss the banter (as we say in Ireland) with great friends and family. Its hard in lockdown – with all the restrictions in place and family/friends being spread out in different countries. But, all the funny moments and the memories are precious – making the much needed hug when all this is over, even more special!! A drink of choice over a video call will have to do for now, but thats ok.


Family and friends

Tea with milk

The perfect blend

-connectwithpoetry.com